Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Bike Helmets piss me off

I hadn't realized how prevalent the wearing of bike helmets had become until riding on some trails this past weekend. I thought it was just kids wearing these stupid fucking things, but now there are adults and even elderly doing so.

I have now road a bike for around 30 years without ever getting seriously injured. I've crashed into trees, parked cars, poles, buildings, ect. and I'm fine. (fine is a relative term). I don't even understand how you hit your head while riding a bike? Are you doing endo's because your double chin weighs 200 lbs? Are your reflexes so slow that you can't get your arms extended to brace your fall? Do you drool a lot?

Did you wear a bike helmet when you were a kid? No, because people weren't giant pussies back then. Back in the day a father would tell their kid to rub some dirt on it and shut the fuck up or they would give you something to cry about. It's all a marketing ploy to sell stupid helmets. They make it seem like you are a bad parent if you don't force your kid to wear one, then you buy one to set a good example. Why not just put your kid in a coat of armer or one of those bomb defusing suits? Don't fall victim to the Helmet Shim-Sham.

I have never in my life known or heard of anyone getting seriously injured on a bicycle besides getting hit by a car. If you get hit by a car I think you have more pressing issues then if you were wearing a cheap piece of plastic on your head. Chances are your legs will be busted long before your head.

I also can't get over the old people I saw wearing this shit either. They probably go home and cook with straight lard, but a bike helmet is the best way to prolong their life? These are probably the same people that fall prey to the West African email scams.

These types of helmets don't even look like they would do anything unless you were dropped directly on your head. If you really want your kids to be safe from all the "danger" of a 5 mph bike ride then get them a skate boarding type helmet that will actually protect something.


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